Have Media Will Travel

A blog about outdoor adventure, family travel, national parks, media, technology, marketing, fitness and me.

Family

Are You Deciding, or Are You Committing?

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If you’re like me right now, with only a few days until Christmas and with homemade sweets at every turn, you might be thinking about New Year Resolutions. Most of us are indulging, justifying it by saying, “Once the new year gets here, I’ll make changes.” For now, pass me the fudge. And the pecan sandies. And the egg nog, and while you’re at it, the Irish creme and everything else that’s full of yummy.

So, I’m recycling a video blog I did some months ago. Thanks to my good friend, Sharon Terhune, (a fellow athlete at Elemental Training Center) for interviewing me about a distinction I made between deciding and committing that enabled me to lose significant weight and get myself into good health.

An Inquiry: What Does Hard Work Get Me?

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I have been reflecting on a reality about myself: I am most fulfilled after hard work and effort, to the point that if something isn’t hard work, and is (gasp) easy, I’m not as interested in pursuing it and certainly not as fulfilled by it. I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately.

In other words, why is working hard at and/or for something so important to me? What is that all about?

    Below are some of the responses/reasons I’ve come up, to the question, “What does hard work get me?:


The end — or “reward” — is greater
Character building
Transformation (often)
Increased confidence
Forward progress
Expansion
Stimulation
Ahead
Better
Great
Skilled
Experience
Stories
More memorable experience
Close to my limits
Optimism
Greater fulfillment
Aliveness
Purpose
Growth
More possibilities (options)
An opportunity to fight the saboteur that says I can’t do it

You know the saying, nothing worthwhile is easy.

I know most everyone works hard. I’m not special in that I like hard work. But in thinking about all this I’ve realized that some of the experiences that resulted in the greatest outcomes for me, and, resulted in “transformation,” were experiences that were particularly hard — beyond my original expectations — and through which I had to endure. I’m talking about those experiences you’d likely never choose to do again, but that helped develop you and grow you in ways that are invaluable.

I can recall many of these experiences, but following are two examples.

One was in the early 1990s when, as newlyweds, Jerry and I moved away from the beautiful Rocky Mountains to a very small town in the Midwestern plains. The job was stressful and the environment was not what we preferred (it didn’t have any mountains). It was hard in all senses of the word. Every day was a trial at work and away from work.

The outcome, however, was that because of the experience, I’m smarter and better. But would I do it again? Would I have signed up for it if I had known just how difficult it would be? I’m not sure I would. And yet, no question, it was a more rewarding and valuable experience as a result of the hardships.

Another is my Rim-to-Rim-to-Rim of the Grand Canyon last May. Sure, doing it in one day is hard enough. But doing most of it with two fully-blistered feet meant it was much harder than I expected or that it should have been. The experience required me to stretch mentally and emotionally beyond anything I had ever been required to do before. And as a result, it was a deeply transformative experience for me, for which I’m grateful. I am stronger and my “limits” of capability are set higher as a result.

My point here is that often we are transformed (and made stronger and better) as a result of a trying experience only after it’s over. While we may not have signed up for it had we known all it would entail, we don’t regret it. We can’t.

I think one understanding I gain from this reflection is that we should in fact do some things now and then that are so hard they are scary. If for no other reason than to learn and further develop ourselves.

And by the way, why is it that we so often think that unless it’s hard, it’s not work? In fact, travel and tourism promotion, content development, marketing, social media, blogging, etc., all come pretty easy to me. As a result, sometimes it’s hard for me to count these things as real work, but they are.

Malcolm Gladwell, in his book, Outliers, The Story of Success, which I highly recommend, wrote about how it takes 10,000 hours of deliberate practice to really master a skill. I’ve definitely put in 10,000 hours of “work” in the aforementioned core competencies so perhaps that’s why work sometimes feels too easy to be considered work.

So. Doing things that are hard comes easy to me. Doing things that are easy comes hard to me. See how this works? I should like doing things that are easy because their being easy actually makes them hard.

Thanks for tuning in and reading. I really appreciate your readership and support.

P. S. I would love to get your input/comments on this post, or about how you view hard work and hard effort. Thanks

Day Started Like Only a Monday Could

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So, as some of you know I go to the gym three mornings a week at “dark thirty” to work out.

Today was one of those days. I awoke to 6″ of fresh snow on the ground. That was great! But then things went downhill, fast.

As I dashed outside in the deep snow I accidentally pressed the alarm/panic button on my car’s remote. Oops. After what seemed like an eternity, but was really (only) 3 alerts, I was able to stop the panic. I’m sure I am now black-listed by all my neighbors. Certainly, I would understand.

Then, I could not get the driver’s door, or any of the doors, open. I’m pretty strong… Were they frozen solid?

So I did what would be considered by many of my girlfriends who are wives as unthinkable. I went and woke Jerry up to ask him if he could help me get the door(s) open on the car so I could be on my way.

I do not deserve Jerry. He was down there opening my door in no time (by pressing the “unlock” button on the remote). He even went the “extra extra mile” and scraped my windows. (BTW, he looked pretty good in his boxes and pack boots). Then the driver’s side wiper broke. It stopped wiping. Oh well.

On the upside, I had a great workout and saw a huge buck (a male mule deer with a huge antlers) on the way home so my little adventure at dark thirty had a happy ending.

I Am Thankful for So Much.

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This Thanksgiving, I am feeling particularly blessed, and reflecting on all the gifts in my life.

Jerry, our sons and I on a hike in our backyard.

I am thankful for my husband, Jerry, and our three sons, Wolf, Hayden and Finis. Jerry is the perfect life partner. He’s my partner in crime in all the adventures I love to do, my best friend and my biggest champion. He laughs at me and with me. He gives me courage and he holds me up. He encourages me to be the best I can be. And, he loves me unconditionally, which I’m sure is not always easy to do. I look forward to growing old with him and am blessed beyond words to have the opportunity to do so.

Our sons fill me up. I never knew how deep love could be until each of them entered my life. They cause me to slow down and see things — the small wonders in this world that I would otherwise miss. I “happy cry” all the time due to these three young boys that are our sons. Everything I do means more because of Jerry and our boys. Guys: I love you from the bottom of my heart, with all of my heart and more than life itself. Thank you.

My parents, with our sons, during an afternoon of flying kites.

I am grateful for my parents, Nancy and Bill Sniffin, who have given me unconditional love, a great up-bringing, support, friendship and opportunity, and who have taught me, among so many other things, to be polite and respectful, about the value of hard work, to care for others, and to dream. My mom is the strongest, and yet most gracious person I know and she, more than anyone, teaches me about strength and kindness. My dad is one of the most successful, self-made people I know, and he is big on dreaming. I am a dreamer and an optimist because of him. Thanks to my parents, also, for moving us to Lander, Wyoming, when I was just a young girl. I love you both so much. Thank you.

I am grateful for my sisters, Alicia and Amber, and for my brother, Michael. Thank God they will be in my life forever, and I know on each of them I can always lean. I’m enriched by them and all the wonderful memories I have of time spent with each of them and/or all of them at once. I wish each of you and your families were geographically closer. But you are always near in my heart. I love you, sisters and brother. Thank you.

I am grateful to all my relatives and extended families. I love and thank you all for everything and for adding to my life.

With some of my dear friends.

I am grateful for all of my friends. I love you all. I have such meaningful relationships with each of you. Each of our friendships make my life richer. Many of you push me in ways that make me have a more fulfilling life. Thank you.

I am grateful for my mentors, teachers, colleagues, vendors, clients, customers and “champions.” You have all helped me lead a successful and purposeful life thus far. Thank you.

I am grateful for acquaintances I’ve made, and acquaintances I’ve yet to make. Relationships enrich my life and I look forward to creating new relationships with you in the future.

I am grateful for small things, like Jerry’s delicious coffee and fried eggs, playing board games or dancing with our sons, flying kites, camping, long epic hikes with Jerry and/or my girlfriends, short family hikes, Friday ice cream socials with the boys, family get-togethers at my parents’, s’mores, good books, red grapes, merlot, dark chocolate, winter adventures, blue skies, sunshine, and so much more.

I’m grateful for living in Lander, WY — on the frontier of Wyoming, and in the foothills of my beloved Wind River Range. I can’t imagine living anywhere else. I am right where I wish to be. I don’t love any place more than this one.

I am also grateful for the freedoms we enjoy, and for the life we are able to have in our great country.

Happy Thanksgiving. I wish you a wonderful and memorable Thanksgiving holiday.

I Am Here, But I’m Not. Not Really.

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One of the things I’m working on is being more present in the moment.

Specifically I am wanting to do better at these things:
–Single tasking
–Focusing
–Living in the moment
–Becoming a much better listener
–Being more present

Actually, these things, although numerous, are all related. In fact, I think if I could become a much better listener I’d be much better at all of the above.

One of the things I learned at my recent coaches training course, Fundamentals, is that there are three levels of listening. The first is the one where you’re listening mostly to your own thoughts. (For example: Did I unplug the iron? Gosh my response sounded stupid. I can’t forget about the playdate. I have to remember to go to the store and pick up some grapes after this. And so on.)

The next level (Level 2) is laser focused. Think of two people when they are first falling in love. When they’re together, the other person consumes the other’s attention. It’s high level, direct, focused listening.

The third level of listening is deep. It’s is when you are listening at a high level to what’s being said and communicated, but your senses are more keen. As a result, you’re picking up the mood and energy, subtle things that are happening, nonverbal communication, etc., — and your intuition often kicks in during this level of listening.

I think I’m really good at the first kind of listening and pretty good at the third level as well. But, the second level — the laser-focused listening — I am not good at. That is, unless I’m very interested in what it is you are saying. The problem is, of course, that if you’re the listener, it’s not up to you what the person is saying. It’s safe to say that, most of the time, I am not a good direct listener.

Because, well, it requires too much of my attention. I’ve got a lot going on in my brain.

Not to brag, and in fact this is not bragging because, turns out, it’s nothing to be proud of, I am phenomenal at juggling lots of tasks at one time and somehow not letting any of the balls hit the floor.

Unfortunately, I’m missing out on a lot as a result. There is a lot of science, and plenty of articles that support this.
Wandering Mind is a Sign of Unhappiness
The Madness of Multitasking
Multitasking Makes You Stupid

By the way, I’m no stranger to the concept of “compartmentalizing” — the act of neatly managing activities and time by scheduling via grouping(s). In fact, one of my favorite authors is Tim Ferriss (Four Hour Work Week). Famous for “lifestyle design” tips, Ferriss’ batching concept is something I’ve tried before, but never adhered to. This is a little different from what I’m working on, but it’s all related to the fact I’m not good at narrowly focusing my attention.

Let me state for the record that generally, no one in my life is complaining about my multitasking or inability to live more in the present. In fact, I can’t remember any of our three young sons, or my husband, complaining about this. And, also, for the record, the thoughts that consume my head space are almost always positive and exciting in nature. Often they involve books I’m reading, or events that are coming up, or fond memories or ideas for business. Mostly they are not what I would consider nagging thoughts. Heck, much of it is dreamy — as in, “day dreaming.”

Still, according to science, I’m missing out. I want to experience more fully the times I’m playing Legos with our three boys. I want to hear, on a deep level, what they say when they’re expressing something to me. And even though I could argue, pretty effectively, that taking the long view in lieu of being still and celebrating the present has served me well most of my life, I think I’m short-changing myself by focusing too much on future events and ideas instead of the task or event at hand.

So, I’m determined to improve this about myself. I started this weekend, by going offline — totally “disconnecting” — from my cell phone, texting, email and computer use, from 6 am Saturday morning until 6 am Monday morning (today). I think I made progress in being more present by removing significant distractions.

I want to be careful not to complain about technology. In fact, I love technology and I feel strongly that social connectedness enriches one’s life. Certainly living out on the frontier of Wyoming, and working alone in an RV by the river, can be lonely and isolating, even. I love my Facebook relationships, and I love having the unlimited knowledge at my fingertips that is provided by the internet. I love capturing precious moments in photos and videos and then sharing them with my networks of friends and family. These truly enrich my life in so many ways, and in my opinion, are not bad things.

Except for when they distract me from my loved ones.

But, as they say, help is on the way. 🙂  From time to time, I’m going to continue to limit my “virtual” connectedness in an effort to be more connected with the right now.

Thanks for listening!